Letters to Baby, 2

Dear N-,

There are a lot of things I want you to grow up with. In my mind, there are some experiences, sights, and smells that I hope will create happy, comforting childhood memories for you to take with you when you get older. Maybe, if you read these, you'll be able to tell me whether I was successful. Because even though I can't pretend I'll be a perfect parent, or that you will have a perfect childhood, I do think there are such things as perfect memories that you can cherish for a lifetime.

One thing I hope you grow up with is a home full of delicious smells. I love to bake, and I think it would be wonderful if you associated home with frequent aromas of fresh bread, cookies, cakes, and biscuits. I really like to cook too, so there will be nice, savory smells too - of pot roast, chicken adobo, seared meats, and warm soup. I hope that I can be home often enough to cook almost every day, and bake almost every weekend. (Everything in moderation, though! I don't want to give you diabetes or something...) They say that smell is the sense that is most closely linked with memory, and it is my wish that delicious smells trigger happy memories for you. I also want you to gain an appreciation for the power and importance of food - the way it brings people together and how it is often the most enduring aspect of culture. I may not know how to speak Tagalog or what the customs of my people are, but I do know how to make adobo and lumpia. Good, quality food is an amazing thing, and I hope you will gain an appreciation for the way it nourishes both your body and soul.

It's important to both me and your father that you gain an appreciation for books as well. Though I admit that, right now, I don't read as much as I should, I have a great fondness for books and stories. You'll find that your father is even more of a bibliophile than I am. I've always dreamed of having a nice, big bookcase full of books in a little study in a house where one could curl up in a warm, cozy chair and spend a lazy afternoon simply losing oneself in a good story. My hope is that you will have such a little study at your disposal, but even if you don't, I do hope you will find the idea of a lazy afternoon spent reading as appealing as Sam and I do. I plan on reading to you nightly almost as soon as you are born, so that maybe you won't ever remember a time that wasn't filled with words and stories. When you're a little older, I can imagine that storytime will be a nice family tradition for the three of us. I hope that, as an adult, you will look upon those times with great fondness, and pass on the tradition to any children you may have.

Finally, the most important memory I want you to grow up with is the constant knowledge that your parents love each other very much. Many children unfortunately do not get to have this reassurance, but I think it's important for how one grows up understanding love and family. I adore your father, and I know he feels the same way about me. I don't know how your birth will change our relationship, but I do know that we are both utterly in love with each other and committed to each other. I imagine you'll find this gross at some point as a child or teenager, but I hope that one day you will look back on us and smile at the silliness and affection between your two parents. I hope you will look past the constant barrage of messages from society that tell you that marriage is confining and arduous, and rather think back upon our marriage and see how it can be freeing and beautiful.

Ultimately, I want your childhood to be filled to bursting with family, comfort, knowledge, and love. I hope to provide you with a rich beginning to life so that, when you go off to pursue your own goals and dreams, you will have a wealth of goodness to draw strength from.

Love,
Your mother